Lance Lynn is mad that you're thinking about Michael Wacha already.
Hypothesis: Carlos Beltran feels the need to bunt because every fifth day Joe Kelly is unavailable to play small-ball off the bench.
The St. Louis Cardinals and the Pittsburgh Pirates have agreed to play even more baseball.
A doubleheader right before the trade deadline seems like a gross misuse of open thread resources.
THIS IS A THREAD IN WHICH TO RALLY,
Joe Kelly's internet history is just a bunch of return visits to Jake Peavy's Wikipedia page.
J.D. Drew could not be reached for comment.
Both of these guys could be superhero secret identities or love interests in Adam Sandler movies.
Two of the Cardinals' six All-Stars were noticeably unpopular during introductions.
In his career to date Lance Lynn is 30-11 with 333 strikeouts in 323 innings (and a basically league-average ERA, somehow.)
Joe Kelly makes his second start since becoming the fifth starter.
Adam Wainwright and a certain Houston Astros pitcher.
After falling for all kinds of fifth starters only to get hurt, again and again, the Cardinals finally realized that the guy of their dreams had been with them all along.
Jake Westbrook starts are less boring if you do a little worldbuilding. In my universe, every fly ball Jake Westbrook allows lands on and destroys a tiny city of sentient creatures.
If I were on the AL side of SB Nation I would misspell "Jered" at least once a month.
The thing I love about interleague is it gets us these natural rivalries.
Stealth Interleague edition.
in which Shelby Miller toes the rubber against Martin Perez whenever it's done raining.It's June 22! Shelby is 22! So is Martin Perez. There's your pre-game analysis.
Holland vs. Lyons Kelly We'll start tonight's tilt at 4-4, just for larfs!
Lance Lynn, the other Cardinals starter in the middle of a career year.
Jake Westbrook is proof there's life after 21 for members of the St. Louis Cardinals' rotation.
I should probably know Jeremy Hefner is a real person by now.
The Tyler Lyons experience continues.
St Louis tries to finish the 4-game set all even up.
The biggest difference between the old Cardinals and the new Cardinals: The old Cardinals would have been the ones starting Ervin Santana in this game.
Yadier Molina isn't as interesting a story as the St. Louis Cardinals' inexhaustible supply of pitchers, but he's even more crucial.
If you need to get more psyched up, pretend Volquez is still a Red.
Lance Lynn's strikeout rate is higher this year than it was last year, which is nice.
Our fragile hero Jaime "The Artist of the Mound" Garcia takes on "Wily" Wily Peralta
This is a game thread where we talk about game and threads.
If John Gast picks somebody off tonight, this is going to be a very loud gamethread.
Can Adam Wainwright keep things rolling along all copacetic?