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Breaking: Cardinals sign Matt Carpenter

Yes, you read that right.

MLB: St. Louis Cardinals at Chicago Cubs Kamil Krzaczynski-USA TODAY Sports

In a move nobody saw coming, the Cardinals shocked us all and signed Matt Carpenter. That is a thing that happened. My dad called me and “broke” the news to me, and I just didn’t believe him. It did not help that a quick google search at the time revealed no information about the signing. Soon enough I found out the truth.

It’s a move that reminds me a lot of signing Albert Pujols, except oddly, there is more justification for signing Matt Carpenter. I mean this is probably going to get lost to history and age badly, but Carpenter has a 109 OPS+ projection from ZiPS and has a wRC+ 16 points better against RHP than against LHP in his career. That’s a stronger reason than Pujols had to be honest.

Carpenter, as far as I know, has no milestone to reach like Pujols did so there’s just no way the magic is replicated. But let’s hope it works out half as good as the Pujols signing