Can you guess these Cardinals from their quotes?

My fellow citizens,

I interrupt your regularly scheduled Hunt and Peck post courtesy of lil underscore scooter 93 to deliver an urgent message. The state of this St. Louis Cardinals community we all hold so dearly is in utter shambles. For starters, our eternal overlord Craig Edwards has transcended us mortals and moved on to pursue bigger and better endeavors, namely, writing about something called a Cameron Rupp at fangraphs dot com. Baby Come Back!

To complicate matters even further, aforementioned VEB writer/editor Heather Simon is currently on vacation, leaving today’s noon time slot in danger of slipping away into a black hole of vacancy...or so it seemed. The end result is me producing what technically qualifies as content to appease the demands of the masses. However, we have ample amounts of empirical data to prove that my contributions to this website directly correlate with a lower quality product.

[Mandatory photo credit: I swear if you reproduce or retransmit this photograph in any form or disseminate the accounts and descriptions of this post without my express written consent I will literally call the cops on you.]

Wow! When comparing the overall quality of VEB content to the percentage of it that I produce, we find that, indeed, I am singlehandedly plaguing this blog. The perfect r^2 value of 1 explains 100% of our data points. Insufferable as it may be, you people are left with no choice but to settle for my subpar content while begging for mercy and waiting for Heather to return.

But I digress. Even in the face of such hardship, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. For I have devised a solution to remedy our lack of #OnlineBaseballContent.

What I have created is a 10-question quiz for you to attempt. I selected at random 10 different St. Louis Post-Dispatch articles from last year that included quotes from various Cardinals players. Your task is to correctly guess who each quote belongs to among the four options. Admittedly, many of the quotes I chose have a sizable amount of cliché baked into them, but I have complete faith in you to “stay in moment and take things one question at a time.”

If the quiz doesn’t appear on your device, you can still access it by clicking on this link.