a tale of two closers

as an interesting twist for those who were a little underwhelmed by the jason motte two-year, $12m extension earlier this year, another team just bought out its closer's last two arb-eligible years of club control. the san francisco giants signed sergio romo to a two-year, $9m extension.

with one glaring exception, romo looks better than the better-paid motte.

motte 260.0 IP; 282 G; 2.75 ERA; 3.27 FIP; 3.40 xFIP; 26.3% K; 7.4% BB

romo 233.1 IP; 276 G: 2.20 ERA; 2.40 FIP; 2.88 xFIP; 30.4% K; 5.3% BB

the big difference: jason motte has 54 career saves, while romo has 17.

it's not a case of romo not having the gritty, gritty guts to close. romo had to wait for brian wilson to get injured to take up the closer role, while motte only had to wait for the bottom to fall out from under ryan franklin, whose regression-defying seasons recalled Wile E. Coyote running off the cliff's edge and treading air for several long steps before gravity took hold.

and yes, the cardinals were right to anticipate that a slightly inferior pitcher like motte with a lot of saves to his name would fare well at arbitration. my point is not so much that the cardinals' offer was crazy ("generous," maybe) but that, for whatever reason, baseball still awards a ton of value for amassing saves. mostly, the system seems to be rewarding players for having the "skill" of relieving for a team that doesn't have a very good closer to block your way.

i'm not sure what should be done about this, except that jason motte probably needs to take sergio romo out to a really nice dinner on his dime when the cardinals next play the giants.

* * *

pity poor kyle lohse, who sits lonely at the edge of the prom floor. nobody wants to dance with him.

except, wait, duckie offered him $12.5m to dance with him at the prom. and lohse turned him down. he doesn't feel that way about duckie.

so, nobody feel sorry for kyle lohse.

* * *

reid brignac has been DFA'd by the Rays. should we bite?

well, he's had a weak MLB career thus far. he's been roughly replacement value over several seasons.

the upside is that he still has good-ish projections; oliver thinks he'll be about a 1.2 win shortstop, which is no better, but no worse than ryan jackson or greg garcia. it's somewhat better than pete kozma and ronny cedeno.

we could do worse than pick him up for pocket change. it would really only cost us a roster spot.

odds are that he doesn't provide much value, but he plays in a position where we should probably throw as much as possible at the wall. he looked decent in 2009 and 2010, and is coming off a couple of weak seasons. if he returns to his earlier form, he could be a good deal.

i think he'll get picked up by another team in more need, but it's something to watch.

* * *

in the wake of the news of the chris carpenter injury, the american expletives corporation stock (NYSC: AMFEC) dropped 87%. a visibly-shaken CEO announced that the american expletives corporation was shocked to hear about the most recent, potentially career-ending injury to its best consumer.

he stated that the AEC board was hiring several consultants to review different means to preserve their brand. options to be considered include: diversifying their business model, such as marketing twitter hashtags; expanding their customer base, such as by trying to teach japanese girls to say "&^$#*" instead of "peace!" when having their pictures taken; or trying to recapture their original base, such as by trying to get chris carpenter to take up golf.

"$#%@" futures were trading at a record low, due to the apparent oversupply on-hand." #$@#$-bastards" were selling at $2.49 a bushel, off from an average price of $10.31 a bushel for 2012.

the SPFCCMFT, also known as the Carlin index, dropped to an unprecedented 1.36 from its historic trading high of 764.32 in late may 2011, when mr. carpenter pitched for a 5.12 ERA for the month and had to watch ryan theriot play shortstop.

some experts predicted the expletives market would never fully recover from a permanent chris carpenter injury. others noted that future developments could see a long-term rebound for the industry, noting that tracy morgan may resume his stand-up career with the end of "30 Rock."

european markets were largely unfazed by the news overseas, with "bloody #$&@*^% c^&^s" trading at normal levels.