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ALBERT PUJOLS SIGNS baseballs and autographs, sometimes

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for small children, some of whom have developmental disabilities. and that is why he is a kind, generous man.

unless he is a greedly scoundrel who wishes to get all the money in the world by moving to new york or chicago and bathe naked in a pile of hundred dollar bills. i can't remember what the narrative for today is. but he's supposed to decide today whether he's going to sign an extension, or hit the free agent market in the fall.

he might also be the innocent patsy of sweaty union reps who manipulate him for their own nefarious ends, probably communist in overtone. if there is anything that those communist unions love, it's making sure spectacularly wealthy people get paid enormous amounts of money, rather than slightly less enormous amounts of money,  in keeping with the fair market value of their worth. that's the communist rhetoric at its worst.

anyway, albert is everyone's hero unless he is a villain, or possibly he is someone just trying to get paid a ridiculously large amount of money by somebody who also has a lot of money.

personally, all this makes me want to stay home and drink my way through wednesday, and find out what happened when i get up on thursday.

 the only thing that gives me any comfort is the fact that derrek goold has put together the catchiest national meme on albert: albertageddon. maybe his creativity will net him a promotion or a raise, or maybe joe strauss will have to stop condescending to him.

albertageddon is upon us. the four tweeting horsemen approach, waving their smartphones. tony la russa is about to open the fifth seal, which will rain down blood and humorously misplaced "ng" sounds on the world. yesterday's thread is full and today's not yet here. so as the rumors roll out, collect them and discuss here!