Hello!!! and welcome to the St. Louis Cardinals Pitching Meltdown FAQ ~version 1.3a~

~~~The St. Louis Cardinals~~~
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                          ____/   by Kyle Lohse (VERSION 1.3a DON'T COPY)                                                      
                                  

CREDITS:
Kyle Lohse (Xx_baseballking_xX@mindspring.com): Managing Editor
Colby Rasmus (romeo.claude@mit.edu): Some Math Stuff
Brendan Ryan (denirolol---at---hotmail---dot---com): Cool logo (THANKS Brendan!)
This file is ONLY on Viva El Birdos and GameFAQs, if you see it somewhere else it's STOLEN PROPERTY.
( C ) Lohseman Unlimited, 2012

CHANGELOG:
1.3a: Added cool logo (THANKS Brendan!)
1.2: Took out the part about Jake Westbrook being awesome all the time, geez man haha
1.1a: Added to changelog
1.1: Created changelog
1.0 alpha: Uploaded the FAQ

CONTENTS:
0.1: Logo ( C ) Brendan Ryan
0.2: Changelog
0.3: Contents

1.1: Walkthrough: How to lose to the Philadelphia Phillies
1.2: Jake Westbrook FAQ
1.3: Fernando Salas FAQ
1.4: Victor Marte
1.5: Easter Eggs

2.1: Credits
2.2: Copyright

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this is a bloodbath. runs, everywhere, at the drop of a hat. the cardinals have not yet fully recovered from a 6-run blowup in the first two innings by jake westbrook, and the bullpen is not helping matters much.

The St. Louis Cardinals have done it: They've gotten almost all the faberge eggs, even the cracked and dull ones, out of Memphis. I'm a little sad about Steven Hill, their emergency replacement for Matt Carpenter, ruining a baseball-reference page that until this morning had one game on it—1-3, 1 HR, back in 2010—but maybe this will be enough to get him on the first page of his own Google results.

And he's the obvious pick for the temp job; this is a team devoid of right-handed hitters, and like Carpenter he can play—or at least has been allowed to play—third, first, and the outfield corners, in addition to his status as the Cardinals' long-time kind-of-catching kind-of-prospect.

Anyway, Hill was, with Mark Hamilton and Bryan Anderson each slumping, probably AAA Memphis's best hitter. The lineup they ran out last night, in their 9-3 loss to the Tucson Padres, is almost completely unrecognizable to a seasoned Future Redbirds watcher. Let's take a look—the Cardinals are one injury away, at a number of positions, from this band of minor league free agents (some of whom are, here on midnight Thursday, still listed with former teams) cracking the 25-man roster. Here it is: The lineup the Memphis Redbirds brought out on a night when the Cardinals saw at-bats from Shane Robinson, Matt Adams, and Steven Hill, started Lance Lynn, and got an inning from Victor Marte:

Starting with the remaining prospects and ex-prospects:

Zack Cox: This probably isn't a long-enough St. Louis engagement for the Cardinals to have ever thought about bringing up their 2010 first-rounder to plug the gap between Carpenter and Allen Craig, but his sub-.600 OPS makes that conversation even easier to not have.

Cox is in an awkward position, much like any writer trying to use his last name in a variety of sentence structures; he was drafted as a high-floor, nearly ready college hitter without having any particularly exciting tools or upside. What does a star look like, developing out of an average third baseman who can hit .300 and might pop 15 home runs? And is he allowed to slump when he's supposedly so close to that upside already, and on a major-league contract? I never quite got this pick when the Cardinals made it—he's always seemed like Brett Wallace in moderation—but his tepid performances in the high minors have made things worse.

It's worth mentioning here that Cox is 23, and started slow last year, too. But it's also worth mentioning that in this nightmare lineup he still batted eighth. Wednesday night he went 1-3 with a double. It's his ninth of the month, but his May renaissance has, so far, been worth a batting average of .233.

Ryan Jackson: Ryan Jackson! Tyler Greene is hitting .247/.326/.482 right now, so calls to see Jackson's highly touted defense in the big leagues are at a low ebb, but he hasn't done anything to ding his prospect standing in his first trip through the Pacific Coast League. Jackson was 1-3 with a home run and a walk Wednesday, scoring two of the Redbirds' three runs.

Continue reading this post »

Go Cards.

Going for the sweep

Optimism in the air

Jeff Suppan. Really?

The St. Louis Cardinals placed utility man Matt Carpenter on the 15-day disabled list this afternoon with a strained oblique. To replace Carpenter on the roster, the Cardinals purchased the contract of Steven Hill from Triple A Memphis. The news was first tweeted by BJ Rains of Fox Sports Midwest.

Carpenter was in the lineup batting second last night and ripped a first-inning double; however, he injured himself on the swing and was removed from the game after the play. Despite playing primarily third base in the minors, Carpenter has seen the majority of his playing time come at first base for the Cardinals this season due to injuries. Carpenter has also played third base, left field, and right field this season. With a .288/.356/.519/.875 line, Carpenter's versatility will be missed.

Hill has played one big league game and that was in 2010. In it, he went 1-for-3 with a homer. The farmhand has been a player without a set position. In his first year as a pro, Hill played first base, catcher, and left field. Over the spant of his entire minor-league career, he has also seen playing time at third base and right field. Hill's career minor league hitting line is .287/.338/.516/.855. In 2012, with Memphis, he has hit .257/.303/.471/.774.

The Cardinals will use Hill to fill a bench spot until Jay or Craig is able to return from the disabled list. Jay was placed on the disabled list on May 15 and, if my math is correct, will be eligible to be activated on May 30. Craig was disabled on May 18 and will be eligible for activation on June 2.

It was, to put it lightly, encouraging to see Adam Wainwright look like Adam Wainwright last night. In fact, it was better than encouraging. It was glorious.

How is everyone this morning? I hope you're all doing well.

I had hoped to have a draft preview up today, but I just don't have one ready to go. The draft is coming up in a hurry, and I haven't done nearly as many of them as I had planned on doing. Twelve to fifteen editions is a good number; I've only gotten eight up so far. Oh, well. I suppose there's not much help when days continue to both remain the same length, stubbornly refusing to offer up extra time, and march on at the same terrifying, monotonous, monstrously cruel pace, laughing at our wishes for either peace or hope.

So I don't have a slate of scouting reports today. What I do have, however, is a couple hours of relatively unoccupied time that I plan on spending with you, my imaginary digital friends. So let's have us a chat.

Topics are open; we can talk about baseball of the major league variety, or the upcoming draft, or we could talk about beer. Or the sweet new Nike Air Diamond Furys I plan on purchasing this weekend. Or, well, whatever you like, really. I can't promise I'll be all that engaging this morning, but I will certainly try.

I'm also trying to get a playlist up at the moment; something to cheer me up is what I'm shooting for. Unfortunately, either 8tracks or my computer has decided to misbehave this morning, so I'm not having much success. Hopefully I'll get it figured out relatively soon.

Anyhow, talk. Then I'll answer. You know the drill.

The Baron's Playlist for the 23rd of May, 2012 (click for 8tracks or below for embedded player)

The Baron's Playlist for the 23rd of May, 2012 from aeschafer on 8tracks.