Put Some Hot Sauce On My Burrito (It's OT, Yadi2.)
by Mister Eff on Feb 3, 2010 7:40 PM EST
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Welcome to the third annual Off Topic thread, VEBers.
Today, I'd like to talk to you about something serious which is near and dear to all of our hearts: Burritos.
I love burritos. Effing love 'em! My only problem with them? I can't make them at home. The last time I tried to roll a burrito at home it came out looking like Kathy Bates and Bob Horner's love child. I've honestly contemplated getting a weekend job at Moe's just to learn how to roll a proper burrito in my own home. Why haven't I? After forty hours in the office weekly, my weekends are for drinking and shooting marbles in the Depression, not for earning minimum wage and suffering oil burns.
This lack of ability in the field of burrito rolling is an affliction which I have now come to hear it quite common. So, I came up with a solution. Well, I didn't, per se, but people who make burritos for a living did when Al Gore or Bob Dole or Vidal Sasoon or someother asshole decided that for some reason carbohydrates were bad for us ten years ago (easily the dumbest phase in American culture this century. Eat the burger... NOT THE BUN! Yes, a triple cheese burger sans bun sounds much healthier than just a burger. Thank you, Dr John Goodman). (Number 2 dumbest? The SARS scare. We never even found out what SARS was or how it properly evaluated baseball players performances. Number 3? That time the "Dude your getting a Dell!" guy was popular.) and decided to just dump all of the ingredients of a burrito out of the tortilla and into a bowl.
And, right now, I am eating a burrito bowl with rice, steak, onions, lettuce, cheese, sour cream, jalapenos, fresh lime, and serrano hot sauce... And it is freaking glorious.
[This also reminds me of a time 'bout eight years ago when a friend of mine in North Carolina named Burt went home with a lovely young lady who waited on a group of our friends at a bar and he asked her, once they got to his place, to "put some hot sauce on my burrito, baby" as a euphamism and she (rightly so) had no idea what he meant. I don't remember what became of their relationship, but I'm sure it was a strong, healthy, and lasting one.]
So, anyhoo, if you too suffer from Burrito Rolling-itis, try the burrito bowl. It's quite enjoyable and, if I do say so myself, sensual.
Consider this your Off Topic thread for early February in this, the year of Our Pujols, 2010. Anything goes, besides, well, a lot of stuff. Grab your bag of chex, and enjoy, folks.
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across 110th street, FTMFW
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 3, 2010 8:58 PM EST up reply actions
he would hopefully be chastised for being a motown wanna-be
but probably not. it would be the worst r kelly release not aimed at a 14-year old.
also, the chi-lites are good.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 3, 2010 9:06 PM EST up reply actions
drip-drip-drip
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
did i adrian peterson that joke?
i thought it was golden.
meaning the pee.
pee is gold in color.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 4, 2010 9:08 PM EST up reply actions
maybe if you got out of your mom's kitchen and rolled some real burritos once in a while
you wouldn’t have to resort to this pathetic alternative of “bowls”. rolling is a beautiful craft. if god didn’t give you the ability to roll, you should at least buy a real burrito from someone who can. bowls are ruining america. all of you BOWL-ies make me sick.
also, read my upcoming book: “three beans in august”.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 3, 2010 9:02 PM EST reply actions 3 recs
I just made burrito bowls the other day. I think I mentioned it here.
Anyway, the key to making the burrito is to start with fewer fillings until you get the knack.
"Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown." - tom s.
Onions are supposed to go on your belt
not in your burrito bowl
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 3, 2010 9:30 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
We didn't have white onions
Because of the war!
"...and pujols has given st louis the lead"
Proud Contributor to the Night of the Longest Train Wreck Ever 9/10-9/11/09
I had a burrito for lunch
from a place called burrito beach. I have no idea why they would name a restaurant that, but at least it’s better than the place down the street, burrito buggy (which at least has a logo of a horse drawn carriage)
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 3, 2010 9:31 PM EST reply actions
Those are so good though.
But there is no possible way I can finish an entire one. Not even half I don’t think. My friend and I always had to share.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
That Dude you're getting a Dell guy is in jail (okay maybe not anymore but he was arrested) for drug possession.
Shocker of the century I know.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
So remember the other day when I was warning all of you about Ke$ha?
Well this makes it better: Parody
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Tips to rolling a serviceable burrito...
- Buy the large, mid to high grade tortillas at the supermarket….or make your own, it’s not that fucking hard. The cheap ones usually are too thin and end up tearing.
- If you have a large non-stick skillet, heat it on the stove over medium heat as you get the rest of your ingredients for the inside ready.
- Once the inside ingredients are ready, throw each tortilla on the skillet for about 20 seconds per side. It should be warm but not hot, and should stretch a bit when you pull on it, not tear.
- Use less filling that you’d like for the first few that you roll and put the filling in a triangle shape with the bottom of the triangle closest to the end you’ll be rolling from. This will ensure that your filling works all the way out the edges.
- Fold the bottom over once, then one edge, then the bottom again, then the other edge, then roll over the rest of the way to the end. The key is to not flatten by pushing down.
- …….
- Profit!
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
by fourstick on Feb 4, 2010 9:11 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
I second making your own tortillas.
I don’t make them very often, but they are delicious and fresh.
"Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown." - tom s.
For you NYCers out there,
The “Dude, You’re Getting a Dell” guy works at Tortilla Flats on Washington & W 12th.
No, he will not say it.
Free Melodi Dushane
but will he say
“Vato, you’re getting a ’dilla”
by brackenthebox on Feb 4, 2010 9:58 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs
burritos are awesome
i could eat burritos all day. except for when they are from taco bell. then i just get diarrhea.
Remember that time the Shamwow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker?
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
Yeah those slap chop commercials don't have the same meaning to me anymore.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
but,
you’re still going to love his nuts
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
sham-pow.
right in the kisser.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 4, 2010 9:11 PM EST up reply actions
Beating up a hooker?
I thought he got his ass kicked by a hooker, and judging from his mug shot she gave as good as she got.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
did the cops let him mug a freakin hobo on the way to jail?
I can’t figure out another way that he would haven gotten those clothes. I also can’t believe that a hooker would do him after seeing him in those clothes. Delving any further into this topic just might make me think of things I do not want to think about.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
did he go to the hospital first?
looks like a hospital gown under his coat
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
Hmmmmm.
I also can’t believe that a hooker would do him after seeing him in those clothes.
I think you either have a really optimistic outlook on the overall classiness of prospective “johns” or you’ve never seen an episode of Cops or Taxicab Confessions.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
I can honestly say I have never seen more than 1 partial episode of either
And c’mon, it’s the ShamWow guy, I don’t think they make people of a lower class than that guy.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
I stand by my previous comment...
That was probably the highest class trick she’d turned in months…
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
Or so she thought, anyway
prior to the punches landing on her face.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
Heh.
That album was the soundtrack to seventh grade for me.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
Samesies
Still one of my favorite albums
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 5, 2010 12:49 PM EST up reply actions
I could never get over the fact that the melody to 'lovin' was directly ripped from
the Beatles’ ‘Lady Madonna’
They say that it's never too late, but you don't get any younger...
At least it's a better song than that Offspring song
The one that’s just Obladi Oblada
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
Also
40 oz To Freedom kicks so much ass. That whole album.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
I actually just bought the box set
Everything Under the Sun(it was $40 when I got it a couple of weeks ago), as I had lost all of my Sublime. 3 discs and one DVD. I haven’t watched the DVD yet, but the discs are great.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
Cooks everywhere.
Since there are several people on here who seem to know their colanders from their micro-planes, I’m going to post the contents of my pantry and fridge and ask what I should be cooking with them. I have salt, pepper, the majority of common spices (paprika, thyme, garlic, etc.), plus common Indian spices (Garam Masala, curry powder), plus oil (olive, canola, sesame), butter (and shortening), milk, soy sauce, vinegar (balsamic).
Frozen
2lb Ground beef
1 Chuck roast
Several cube steaks that I have no idea what to do with
Frozen mixed veggies
Frozen corn
Cold
1 hunk Brie cheese
Chevre
Brussels sprouts
2 Corn cobs
Pickels
Mustard
Mayonnaise
White wine
White asparagus
Ranch dressing
Buffalo sauce
Kefir
5 Schlafly’s Irish Stout
2 TJ’s Hefeweizen
Pantry
Cans:
Black beans
Kidney beans
Green beans
Otherwise
Red and yellow onions
Peanut butter
Cashew butter
Alfredo noodles
Ramen
Mainly looking for entree suggestions that use as many ingredients as possible.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
Use your cube steaks to
make some chicken fried steaks, The chuckie I would braise 225 – 250 until it falls apart….use some of that stout for the braising liquid.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
Hmm...
Black beans + kidney beans + onions + stout + ground beef = the beginnings of a nice chili
You just need some tomatoes.
"Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown." - tom s.
I think you could even put the corn in that chili. And some of the spices.
I would. So hazel go get some tomatoes and/or tomato sauce. Those are staples for me. I always have them. Also maybe some garlic.
Is everyone seeing how I cook when I’m here? I just throw things together. It has never failed me.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Not having some canned tomatoes somewhere is a bizarre decision
if not a culinary crime.
I’m pretty much never without a tin or two of tomatoes, at least one tin of chickpeas (for curries) and a few cans of tuna (decent meat substitute for lots of mid-week-type recipes, good with mayo in a sandwich for lunchtime, etc etc).
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 5, 2010 5:00 AM EST up reply actions
It really was strange that there are no tomatoes.
I don’t see how you can make anything!
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
you could make any meal in a bowl.
it’s the lazy man’s casserole. which is the lazy man’s display of a passion for life.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 4, 2010 9:14 PM EST up reply actions
Actually, I do have tortillas.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
What is this, "Chopped"?
For the non-cooking inclined folks that would like to learn, I would say: A) Just start cooking. It may take a few years, but you’ll get it, & B) Get these books: Alton Brown & Notes on Cooking.
I learned everything I know from Rachael Ray.
And him too a little.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
He's awesome, really.
It’s not just one of the better food shows this decades, he has one of the better cable shows period this decade.
And his feasting on asphalt series have convinced me I am doing it wrong. Life in general, that is. If he’s getting paid for that… I’m doing it wrong.
I wish google street would update more often
I’m sick of seeing the plastic chairs the people who used to own my house have on their front porch. Our house looks much nicer now.
Come on!
Nonsensical Christian Slater corporate videos?!? Gold! Okay, that just reminded me way too much of a video Maritz would have shown and it cracked me up.
gervais'd
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 4, 2010 9:18 PM EST up reply actions
I'd be remiss if I didn't mention
DEEP FRIED BACON BURRITO
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 4, 2010 9:16 PM EST reply actions
that looks pretty revolting...
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 5, 2010 5:03 AM EST up reply actions
About once a month I forget that the World Cup is this summer.
Then i remember again and I get really, really excited.
where is it this time around?
/doesn’t really care enough to actually look it up
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
South Africa.
I hope to be well off enough in four years to take a few weeks off and go to the games.
that would be pretty cool
some of my friends are going to the one this year but I don’t think I’m bothered enough about it to go all that way, plus england tickets tend to be muy expensive at these sort of events (though I’ve heard the prices for the WC are supposed to be very affordable, if you can actually get on the list for tix to the more prestigious games).
Who’s your pick to win? I’m gonna go with Brazil as my boring choice, my “out-there” prediction is the Ivory Coast to kick some serious ass; if you actually look at their starting 11, there’s as much talent in there as some of the best sides in the world, and I personally think Didier Drogba is the best out-and-out striker in world football (even though I personally don’t like him).
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 5, 2010 5:09 AM EST up reply actions
What's that quote?
“Football is a funny game. 22 men run around on a field for 90 minutes, chasing a ball, and in the end the Germans win.”
No idea who’s good this year. After the US, I’ll be rooting for the little countries (Slovenia! South Korea!) and African nations, cause it’s about time.
by peach concrete on Feb 5, 2010 12:44 PM EST up reply actions
I haven't even decided who I'm cheering for.
I mean the US but after that I have no idea.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Best teams in the world
are probably (arguably) Brazil, Spain and Italy, with a handful of the other usual suspects behind them (Holland, France, England, Germany, Argentina). However, European teams often don’t do that well in World Cups held outside of Europe (usually due to the heat), so that’s why I’d say Brazil are possible favourites, although from what I’ve heard the climate in SA won’t be that oppressive in the summer, so maybe Spain are up there too. They’re certainly a pretty amazing side.
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 8, 2010 4:39 AM EST up reply actions
is that the spain
that the US beat at the confed cup, in south africa?
to put it another way, was spain fielding its A team?
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
Just looking at the website
yes, it looks to me more or less like their first team. The only relatively big name I see missing is Iniesta (who is an amazing midfielder), but they have some great reserve players in that position like Fabregas and Alonso, so I doubt that hurt them much. So yeah, that was close to the A-team. They’re pretty formidable, that was a damn good win for the States (although it looks from the match stats the US perhaps rode its luck a little bit – 29 shots to 9, 17 corner kicks to 3….).
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 8, 2010 11:39 AM EST up reply actions
SA will be in its winter this summer, right?
They say that it's never too late, but you don't get any younger...
yes, I guess so, I think that's why it's predicted to be quite cold
which I think could give the european teams more of a chance.
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 8, 2010 11:31 AM EST up reply actions
are Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon going to be there?
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
About all I know about soccer
is that there is a movie starring those two and it has something to do with soccer and south africa.
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
i think it's about rugby
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
you mean they're not the same thing?
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
that is my goal as well
2014 in Brazil… I mean, if you’re going to see the World Cup, what better place to go than Brazil? And we haven’t even mentioned Brazilian girls, yet.
"I think he's the best hitter of all time. I think there has never been a better hitter than him. And I know I didn't see them all, but I just don't think there could be." - Adam Wainwright on The Mang
Small sample size of experience
but I rank Brazil 3rd, behind Venezuela and Argentina, in that order.
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
chicas
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
I'd be more excited if Ireland hadn't got robbed
But I’ll be excited to see how the good ol’ USA does
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 4, 2010 11:04 PM EST up reply actions
I was really sick during the 2002 World Cup
So I was up all night every night, and could watch all the matches live at like 3:30 AM. Watching that Ireland team get into the knockout round and that US team make the quarters is what made me love the World Cup. Can’t wait for this summer.
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 4, 2010 11:30 PM EST up reply actions
I was living in a small beach town in NC then
and got the pub down the street from my condo to open at 6 AM for that US v Portugal match. One of my favorite sporting memories. Loved that Cup.
HAHA
oddly, that’s one of my worst sporting memories, and the USA is probably my 3rd team (England & Scotland being 1 and 2). I was betting on that world cup, and (up to that point) doing absurdly well. I think I’d won something like 7 or 8 of my first 12 bets and I was WELL up as a result. For some reason, I lumped nearly all my winnings on that match, and it was all portugal-related; I had one of their players (I can’t recall which) to score the first goal, a chunk of change on them to win, and I think I’d bet on something like a 3-1 scoreline too.
I was at an amusement park that day and stopped by one of the restaurants about 20 minutes in to see what was going on, saw the US 2-0 up and I think I saw the 3rd goal as well. Heh. Spoiled my day.
That said, I’m excited for the US again this year, other than England it’s as easy a group as you could’ve wanted. I sincerely hope there’ll be some good-natured banter going on at VEB during the Eng vs USA match… I certainly think there’s a good chance you make the latter stages of the competition again.
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 5, 2010 5:14 AM EST up reply actions
Worst case
you could always blow up somebodys car to feel better.
"It is easy to be brave from a safe distance." - Aesop
hot sauce on my burrito
Is officially my least favorite sexual euphemsim of the week.
Thanks, eff-arr-eye-tee-zee.
"It doesn't have to be terribly prolific! Just so that it isn't childish and silly." She reflected. "I prefer stories about squalor." J.D.S.
by tom s. on Feb 5, 2010 2:03 AM EST via mobile reply actions
unseating long time incumbent
“i’ma get some stanky on my hangdown.”
happy friday, veb!
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 5, 2010 7:53 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Is anyone else seeing an ad
for “”http://CougarLife.com" target="new">Cougar Life" in the sidebar? What the gently caress do women who believe they are half their age have to do with SBN geeks?
Oh wait. So that’s why the woman with the blue eyeshadow was tickling the nape of my neck with her fake nails while I was perusing the main thread today…
/not making this up
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 6, 2010 1:18 AM EST reply actions
visual evidence
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 6, 2010 1:19 AM EST up reply actions
So is there anything interesting to do/see in Amarillo?
I might have to go to a wedding down there next month, and was wondering if there was anything to do to pass some time.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
Eat a huge steak
They have some semi-famous place where you if you eat their giant steak, a potato, shrimp cocktail, etc. you get your meal free or something. It’s been on Man v. Food and other similar shows. We had a steak from there, but not the Big Texan, and it was pretty good.
I have to admit
Matt Holliday is a funny twitterer.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
the world might just be a giant hologram
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 6, 2010 7:01 PM EST reply actions
i've always suspected that
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
Holy shit.
The commenters there are even stupider than the ones at Fangraphs:
It makes far more sense that as red has the longest wavelength out of the range of light we can perceive, this would explain why the furthest galaxies appear red, as this light is the first to reach us.
Um. No. Light moves at a constant speed. The wavelength is stretched or compressed, but the speed remains the same.
The Big Bang theory is a lot like the god theory. It tries to explain something difficult, by pressing a magic button, whichinstead of explaining anythingjust answers with a “Because”. For example: ‘The universe exists “Because” (god made it/ big bang made it) !!’
Right, except of course that it makes falsifiable predictions and is supported by experimental evidence. Kind of like a theory I’m working on: People on the internet are stupid and will continue to say stupid things. There’s a prediction (people will continue to say stupid things), and there’s evidence (this person being a moron).
hmm…this is a very interesting take on things. People have said things like the universe’s expansion is due to an expanding quantum consciousness, and I think something along these lines might not be entirely untrue
Wow. Just wow.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
hey, kids say the darndest things
those kinds of books are bestsellers. so how about doing one, things i overheard on the internet? break it into sports, science, etc. and just collect all your favorite comments, like those beauts above. and i’m pretty sure i’m serious – just don’t tell me it’s already been done.
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
you mean like a book collecting hillarious comments?
that would be on my coffee table!
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 6, 2010 9:51 PM EST up reply actions
a day late and a dollar short
that’s my motto!
at least spell hilarious correctly, willya!
/kicks a puppy
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
Said it before and I'll say it again
Internet comments are the lowest form of mammalian communication.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
1. bar pickup lines
2. pauly shore routines
3. college sporting chants
4. internet public comments on political blogs
5. internet public comments on sports blogs
"It doesn't have to be terribly prolific! Just so that it isn't childish and silly." She reflected. "I prefer stories about squalor." J.D.S.
7. [redacted for political reasons]
by peach concrete on Feb 8, 2010 9:38 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs
this is fun
7. bumper stickers
8. things bums yell to get your attention
9. stltoday comments (inbred form of aforementioned internet comments)
10. things horny men (boys) yell to get females’ attention
11. neil young lyrics
12. passive-aggressive phrases used by significant others in a vain attempt to coerce you into doing something you probably don’t want to do
13. brand slogans
14. things dick vitale yells to get your attention
15. anything mentioned on yahoo answers
16. award acceptance speeches
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:01 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
You left out...
- Mark Jackson (ESPN NBA color man) exclamations (“Hand down, man down!!!”, “Momma, there goes that man!!!” — seriously, what the fuck do those even mean?)
- Girls Softball chants
- Sports Talk Radio (specifically The Jim Rome Show)
- Political Talk Radio
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
Extra Extra Extra Read all about it!
Fourstick got a hit and we’re gonna shout it! Fourstick got a hit!
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Let's not revisit my junior year of high school...please, lol.
(I dated a softball player and had to go to her games when we weren’t playing baseball)
Most excruciating summer of my life…slap bunting and stupid chants.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
I played softball my whole youth.
I rarely saw any bunts. Makes me grateful for my coaches.
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
In their coaches' defense
All she had to work with were a bunch of short, scrappy girls who could run and the girl I was dating, who went on to play college ball as a first baseman. They’d hit her fourth and then try to slap the ball around to get baserunners on in front of her and move runners into scoring position. The strategy made a ton of sense it was just excruciating to have to watch as a baseball player when only three people on the whole team actually get to swing the bat.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
That was the funny thing...
She hit fourth on the softball team, I hit fourth on the baseball team.
My younger brother was the best player on our baseball team (he hit 3rd that season), her younger sister was the stud pitcher on the softball team.
Both teams went 18-15.
Both teams made it to the final round of sub-state playoffs before losing on a bonehead play.
They lost because their third baseman fielded a pop foul ball 1/3 of the way down the left field line in the bottom of the 7th of a tie game thinking that there were two outs. There was only one out and a girl tagged up and scored from 3rd for the winning run. The batter had struck out 3 times that night already and that was the only ball she’d gotten the bat on. The count would have been 1-2 had she just let the ball drop. Bad play, cost them their season……
We lost in a similar fashion. We had a 2-0 lead against a kid who threw in the low 90’s and ended up getting drafted in the 3rd round of the draft a year later. He’d given up only two hits: he hung a curveball to my brother in the 3rd inning which he crushed over the scoreboard in right field, then followed that up by grooving a first pitch fastball to me, which I crushed INTO the scoreboard (we both hit left handed and threw right handed; my dad claims this was because he knew we were both going to be slow footed and would need the extra step out of the box. In related news, my dad is a funny prick. :-)).
Only two other balls had left the infield, and my brother was throwing a shutout on the mound. He’d been pitching around their best hitter all night, and in the bottom of the last inning, we walked him again with one out. The kid behind him slapped a single to left, making it 1st and 2nd. Our coach called time, and went to the mound as the storm that had been moving in all night started sprinkling.
He struck out the next batter on three pitches. The next hitter (#8 in the lineup) had struck out twice on the night already and hadn’t been able to figure out my bro’s circle change. Got ahead 0-2, and now it’s beginning to pour….kid battled and fought off the next 4 pitches to work the count to 2-2. Change down not quite far enough away — he hits a TOWERING POP UP off the end of his bat towards RF, where I’m playing. I saw it off the bat and started moving to my right, our CF never saw the ball. I completely lost it in the lights and rain, so I kept drifting where I thought the ball was……I picked it up again three steps to my left, as the wind above the field had blown it back towards the line, but I couldn’t get to it in time to catch it. I picked it up and fired it in, but the kid hitting was a state finals sprinter and was rounding third by the time the ball got to the cut off man. He beat the throw by inches to cap the game with an inside the park homer. It’s now 13 years later and I STILL have yet to live this moment down every Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
And Matt Holliday
was forgiven the next day.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
by RiverRat on Feb 8, 2010 8:18 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
Great story.
True fact: I stole home during a game. I am not fast.
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
clearly, you're gritty though.
"It doesn't have to be terribly prolific! Just so that it isn't childish and silly." She reflected. "I prefer stories about squalor." J.D.S.
I was a bad-ass.
You know those weird baseball instincts Albert displays? I have those.
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
I was distracted.
You know those movie catchers that says “check out the blonde with the big tits” during mound visits? This guy —→
"How depressing is it being you? Would you equate it to being a lifelong Cubs fan?"
I've been trying to steal home in RBI Baseball
I don’t think it’s possible. Third is possible, if the pitch is slow enough.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
I never once slap bunted.
I played softball for 8 years.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Well, you were probably a good softball player
most of these girls weren’t very good at all, just fast. Like a track team in softball cleats.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
I would compare it to
running a full court press in basketball. You don’t run a full court press when you have 3 great players and 3-4 good role players, because you wear them out quickly and diminish their effect on the game.
You run a press when you have good athletes but below average skilled talent, because you diminish the better team by making them play your way — thereby decreasing the gap in talent by creating turnovers, havoc, and getting easy baskets.
Same with slap bunting — if you’re playing a team with a good pitcher and you don’t have many (or any) good hitters, you’re better off putting the ball in play on the ground as much as possible and making the infielders or the pitcher field it, especially if you have a team based around speedy players who can beat out throws to first from the LH batters box. I’ve seen too many average hitting teams with good pitchers get beat 1-0 when their pitcher strikes out 14 hitters and they can’t get a run across due to having nobody on base when their good hitters get base hits.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
Be aggressive!
B-E AGGRESSIVE!
B-E-A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E!
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
by spants on Feb 8, 2010 7:18 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Sports Talk Radio (specifically The Jim Rome Show)
How else would we discover the extent of one man’s willingness to call Jim Everett “Chris”?
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:04 PM EST up reply actions
That was then
now all he does is hand out “vines” and talk about horse racing. I refuse to understand how he remains so popular.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
plus he talks like he's a recruiter for the military
the faux hip, young, edgy, “i feel you” shit is really really played out. also he’s…
HOLY HELL THERE ARE BANNER ADS FOR K-Y JELLY IN THE SIDE BARS OF THIS THREAD RIGHT NOW I KID YOU NOT. DAMN IT RANDOMNESS THREAD I KNEW IT WOULD COME TO THIS. MISTER EFF AND HIS BURRITO LUST!
effin’ mister eff…
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 11, 2010 8:57 PM EST up reply actions
Using KY is like camping.
It’s in tents.
by Mister Eff on Feb 11, 2010 9:20 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
and the award for lamest pun of the year goes to...
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 11, 2010 10:08 PM EST up reply actions
That too!
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 11, 2010 10:26 PM EST up reply actions
that better not be a 30 Rock line!
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 11, 2010 10:28 PM EST up reply actions
You SOB's
I might as well go watch it now, before you people ruin it for me.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 11, 2010 11:25 PM EST up reply actions
The wordplay line
is from an old 30 Rock.
The camping line is from my favorite bad joke of all time.
“Hey, did you hear about our camping trip? It was in tents!”
/Cue Norm MacDonald bad chuckle.
I figured Tracy did another Wordplay line tonight
has he really only done that once?
So you steal jokes from multiple sources, that’s what you’re sayin’
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 11, 2010 11:52 PM EST up reply actions
I think "Wordplay" only came up once
“Banter!” and other similar exclamations have made appearances as well
by brackenthebox on Feb 12, 2010 12:04 AM EST up reply actions
I've actually hreard of variation of that joke before
Patient: Doc, ya gotta help me. Yesterday I felt like a wigwam, and today I feel like a teepee
Doc: Well that’s easy, you’re two tents
…or
Patient: Doc, Help! I just swallowed a roll of film
Doc: Hmmm…let’s hope nothing develops.
…or
Patient: Doc, I think I’m losing it, I woke up today feeling like a pair of curtains
Doc: The pull yourself together, man!
…or
Patient: Doc, I get the weirdest feeling that I’m a bridge
Doc: Hmmm…what’s come over you?
Patient: Two cars and a bike, and that’s just today!
..and yes it was totally worth it typing those out. I know quality jokes when I see ’em.
word is, k-y is handy when performing
(thanks, deadspin)
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 12, 2010 9:07 PM EST up reply actions
does that mean the universe is just like on of those funky baseball cards?
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
Something seems odd about this
In particular, why this effect hasn’t shown up here. Emailed my research group about this. Thank you, this is the first I heard of this.
They say that it's never too late, but you don't get any younger...
why I like baseball (a double haiku)
there is no time clock
games almost every day
the offseason is short
a game that is played
by men of all shape and size
gifted in hand-eye
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 6, 2010 10:45 PM EST reply actions
there is no time clock
games almost every day
the offseason is short
a game that is played
by men of all shape and size
gifted in hand-ey
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 6, 2010 10:51 PM EST up reply actions
drinking?
i like the double haiku.
you could use the second for handegg (replacing hand-eye)…if so inclined.
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
and yeah
had a few beers last night!
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 7, 2010 1:23 PM EST up reply actions
wow
cris carter and don coryell didn’t even make the first cut for HOF.
happy for floyd little and especially dick lebeau, though, who made it into the hall as senior-committee nominees.
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
Who ya got in the Super Bowl?
I’m rooting for the Saints for two reasons:
1. Don’t like Peyton Manning
2. Saints are an NFC team like the Rams
Check out my sports blog!
Best moment I've ever seen at a Cards game in person
Follow me on Twitter: @zoomzoomj88
SIGN FELIPE LOPEZ & JOHN SMOLTZ!
i'm rooting for the saints
because i’m in norleans, but i’m not sure which will wreak more havoc on the city – a win or a loss.
money is on the colts, even before my bet tonite with a crazed saints fan who gave me 12 points – bartender is holding our hundred dollars (each). in the big pool there i have saints 4, colts 0. i won their line pool last game. these are all reasons to love this town.
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
win-win
I like Peyton Manning, so I want him to win so Boston will shut up about Brady being a better QB.
if the Saints win, I feel good for the city.
Ultimately, though, I’m rooting for the Colts
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
win-win for me too
I really like both teams, so as long as I’m drunk and gorging myself on chicken wings, it’ll be a good one no matter what.
go Saints!
Manning annoys me to no end, Indy just won a few years ago, and Drew Brees is awesome. plus I like how the Saints defense always comes out on the attack, and they have some pretty cool trick plays too. fun team to watch
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 7, 2010 1:25 PM EST up reply actions
I don't like his well-publicized sideline hissy fits
but anyone who has become famous for something other than acting who does well on SNL deserves a pass from me. I hated Justin Timberlake until I was made aware of his surprising talent for comedy.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:06 PM EST up reply actions
Someone was asking about Photoshop the other day.
Lots of free tutorials on the ‘net, but I didn’t realize that Instructables has a bunch of PS tutorials. The advanced stuff is mixed in with the beginner stuff, but worth checking out for sure.
"Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown." - tom s.
speaking of burritos (the food item, not penile euphemism)
its my brother’s favorite meal too. This organization arranged for a whole mexican meal from Ruiz Restaurant in STL to be packed up and sent to Afghanistan for him and his entire unit. Seems like they do really good work. Not soliciting donations or anything, but thought I’d give a heads up in case anyone was looking for a good organization to donate to or get involved with.
awesome game
pretty good commercials too. although I’m pretty sure the Who should hang it up, it was cool seein them on half time. still can’t believe that onside kick…
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 8, 2010 1:12 AM EST reply actions
sean payton
plays to win, baby.
and that’s the parcells tree winning yet another super bowl.
i ended up watching the game outdoors in a little park here in norleans on a big screen two blocks from my place. came back about an hour after the game, outside grilling, and all i heard were sirens everywhere. some drunk guys walked right in my front door.
still can’t believe the idiot last night was right, that the saints would win by 14. who the hell bets like that and wins?
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
wow
yeah, I was thinking NOLA would be insane after they won that… who said they would win by 14?
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 8, 2010 11:52 AM EST up reply actions
the drunken diehard saints fan
who i took advantage of his zeal…and he took me for 100 bucks. he must be tapped in to some higher consciousness..
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
I’m pretty sure the Who should hang it up, it was cool seein them on half time
There’s some sort of weird paradox going on here…
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 8, 2010 4:46 AM EST up reply actions
I think that they are getting too old to rock
but they were better than most half time shows I’ve seen. the insane light stage didn’t hurt tho
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 8, 2010 11:53 AM EST up reply actions
IMO it's not The Who without Keith Moon
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 8, 2010 10:49 AM EST up reply actions
IMO
whoever those old men were, I hope the nursing home finds them soon.
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 8, 2010 11:40 AM EST up reply actions
Next New Orleans battle cry
WHO SPANTSED?
Y’know, like the derivative of “WHO DAT”? See, I thought it would be topical and…oh hell never mind.
/shows himself the door
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:09 PM EST up reply actions
Even if that is Ringo Starr's kid at the kit...
Pete shouldn’t sing anymore, ever, unless he’s trying to kill some stray dogs or something.
The light stage was cool, but it’s not a good idea to have a kick ass light show when you’re playing and singing can’t live up to your kick ass light show. I’ve seen the Live at Leeds performance — this was like seeing a shitty Who tribute band at my local nursing home or something.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
The shame is that...
…when they started playing, my older daughter (who is turning into a football nut, somehow) were like “who are these old dudes?” I said they were The Who, one of the truly legendary rock bands of all legendariness and time (wait, what? anyway…). Their voices sounded like you would expect for a bunch of 60 year old rock stars. If you had no idea who The Who were you’d probably think they sucked and go back to listening to Lady GaGa or something terrible. That kind of thinking is literally destroying America. Or something. At least ruining apple pie.
VivaElBirdos: Celebrating glorious mustaches since 2009
by redbirdnation8206 on Feb 9, 2010 9:29 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs
On the other hand
Sometimes you just need to know when to call it quits. The Rolling Stones have aged much better than The Who, as have aging rockers like Robert Plant (who’s cut a great album with Alison Krauss and can still pull of Led Zep in the reunion shows), Aerosmith, and Springsteen. Even Jon Bon Jovi doesn’t sing Living on a Prayer much anymore because he can’t sing the high notes.
We always chastise our sports heroes for sticking around too long and ruining their legacy. That’s how I feel about The Who last night.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
Quit while you're ahead
Roger and Pete’s voices sounded like old guys who have been drugssexandrockandroll-ing for waaay too long. How the Stones have kept it up, I have no idea. Robin Williams implied once that a nuclear holocaust could be averted by studying Keith Richards’s blood, because he’s probably smoked everything in the world. And yet… they’re still doing their thing.
I enjoyed seeing The Who play the Super Bowl and all, but I wish it had happened 35 years ago or something. Oh well.
VivaElBirdos: Celebrating glorious mustaches since 2009
by redbirdnation8206 on Feb 9, 2010 1:34 PM EST up reply actions
supposedly keith richards finally quit drinking
after his doctor warned him a few times and he saw what it was doing to one of his bandmates
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 2:40 PM EST up reply actions
FWIW
I am a huge fan of both the Stones’ and the Who’s back catalogues, and I’d say, from what I’ve seen of both bands in the last few years, the Who have maybe aged a bit better. I didn’t see the superbowl, though.
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 10, 2010 4:01 AM EST up reply actions
I dunno
I think it has a lot to do with the fact that Jagger has always been a rhythmic singer that he’s still able to pull it off, but he’s still able to pull it off. Roger Daltrey no longer sounds like Roger Daltrey, and Pete really can’t sing at all now, which was blatantly obvious on Sunday night. They’re just, well, OLD.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
yeah maybe
I think both were obviously much better back in the day. I think the Stones have always been better on record anyhow (despite their rep as a good live act).
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 10, 2010 10:55 AM EST up reply actions
There's a really great Inside the Actor's Studio
from 10 years ago with Billy Joel, where he talks about the songwriting process of the Rolling Stones, specifically Keith and Mick. Check it out if you have the opportunity. It’s a fantastic segment of that interview.
FWIW, I enjoy the early and late portions of the Rolling Stones career, and really loathe the middle section from like 1972-1982 or so.
The Who have been playing the same songs since 1975 for the most part.
Can Colby round out our new MV3?
As if there was a doubt,
Jay Mariotti really is that much of a creep.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
I think he's checking out the guy,
not that there’s anything wrong with that.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
Man
Haven’t heard that phrase much since about seventh grade.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
One of my friends drew a picture of our chemsitry teacher playing pocket pool in my 10th grade yearbook
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 10, 2010 9:00 PM EST up reply actions
Because Mariotti is unique in checking out (presumably) attractive women?
Think; It's not illegal yet.
You know...
…her face could be hideous. I mean, that would be kind of funny, right?
VivaElBirdos: Celebrating glorious mustaches since 2009
by redbirdnation8206 on Feb 9, 2010 9:19 AM EST up reply actions
forget everything else
is his collar popped?
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
Yeah, but that's full-on creepy leer.
Maybe if he didn’t look so reptilian. Oh well, even “f*cking f*gs” (thanks ozzie guillen for that gem) need love too I suppose.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:11 PM EST up reply actions
I saw it
thought it was good, not sure if I thought it was “really” good
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 1:21 AM EST up reply actions
my lodger got it the other day
2nd best movie from 2009 i saw behind the hurt locker, I think, but I didn’t see that many. Yes, I think it’s good.
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 9, 2010 9:30 AM EST up reply actions
did not many of you guys see District 9?
or did people just not like it that much? I thought it was the best movie of the past few years
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 1:29 PM EST up reply actions
well the reason i"m interested in moon at all
is that I liked District 9 so much, and some people I’ve talked to like both, but think Moon was even better. So yeah, I really liked District 9…but best of the last few years? Nah. It wasn’t without its faults. For example, I think it really tapered off in the last third and kind of devolved into one extended quasi-formulaic action sequence. Also, I thought having the antagonists—especially that one shaved head, mercenary/army dude—so one-dimensionally malevolent robbed the movie of some of its complexity. In other places the moralistic subtext was was so in your face it was distracting and ineffectual, like setting it in South Africa for example. I’m just being nit-picky here though, since I really did enjoy the film. One of the best parts of it was Sharlto Copley’s performance, and I’m interested in Moon because I’ve heard from people who loved D9 that Sam Rockwell’s performance was even better.
my critique of moon is sort of the opposite argument
thought it was a little too slow and kinda boring. liked the sci-fi concepts though.
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 2:41 PM EST up reply actions
sorry, the only moon i'm interested in
is sailor.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:13 PM EST up reply actions
Moon is excellent.
It’s pretty hard science fiction, however, so you know what you’re getting into.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
The Roller Girls just posted their stats
and they call them sabermetrics….I’m dying to know who the roller sabr that came up with that is….
"How depressing is it being you? Would you equate it to being a lifelong Cubs fan?"
for the many of you who care
this is comment #1001 for me on VEB. Small potatoes to most of you (especially in this thread, I’m sure), but I was surprised to see it when I happened across my profile. By my rough calculations, my contributions have been as follows:
5% esoteric discussion of math or statistics
5% baseball discussion, usually just echoing someone else’s opinion
10% technical/computer advice/condescension
5% confusing HTML driven tricks
5% crappy photoshops
10% looking up random stuff on google
10% “humor” in the form of extending tired memes
20% “humor” in the form of references to Arrested Development
20% “humor” in the form of references to pop culture/antiquities
10% not wanting to renormalize my percentages
Correction:
5%confusing HTML driven tricksWITCHCRAFT!
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
I still find it hard to believe I have over 20,000 comments
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 1:29 PM EST up reply actions
Damn
My 3420 seemed like a whole shitton.
VivaElBirdos: Celebrating glorious mustaches since 2009
by redbirdnation8206 on Feb 9, 2010 1:36 PM EST up reply actions
Wow.
You have like 10,000 more than me. To be fair though, about 1/5 of your comments are “heh.”
Forget it, spants. It's Chinatown. - tom s.
true
I probably have thousands of one word comments, of course lead by “heh”. heh.
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Feb 9, 2010 2:41 PM EST up reply actions
hah
gotta start padding my stats
Is it Spring yet?
by Bring Back Tommy Herr! on Feb 9, 2010 4:45 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
most of my posts come in low-leverage situations, if I'm honest...
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 10, 2010 4:05 AM EST up reply actions
who says quality and quantity are mutually exclusive?
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:14 PM EST up reply actions
If an installation says it's going to take 29 hours is that wrong?
Should I find a way to restart it?
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Microsoft Office, McAffee Security, and iPrint.
It ended up installing. It just lies to me constantly.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Why do you need McAfee if it's a Mac?
Huh? I thought there were no viruses for Macs?
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 10, 2010 10:32 AM EST up reply actions
Apple recommends using AV software
and it’s probably a particularly good idea on a college campus given the relatively high concentration of macs.
The real question, is why would you use McAfee on any platform.
by brackenthebox on Feb 10, 2010 11:06 AM EST up reply actions
I didn't have a choice.
It downloaded in a package. I thought it was just Microsoft office but it downloaded a bunch of things.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
In case anyone wants to know
Colby’s girlfriend forum just informed me that Colby and baby momma Megan are engaged and have bought a house in St. Louis. I was visiting the girlfriend for an assignment for class where I have to make a spreadsheet of made up information about kids in my fake class. I don’t go there often.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
who or what is "Colby's girlfriend forum"?
RELEASE THE CENTIQUID!!!!
by Felonius_Monk on Feb 10, 2010 4:06 AM EST up reply actions
i concur
i don’t think the phrase “colby’s girlfriend forum” generates the amount of familiarity CG thinks it does.
now, if it were larp.com, we might be in business.
"on gameday it says duke loves to face the four seamer and hates to face the four seamer" -VolsnCards5
"perhaps it's a computer joke about the duality of man." -tom s.
by Tudor's Electric Fan on Feb 10, 2010 9:19 PM EST up reply actions
We have discussed it before.
Every baseball player has one. Type in Colby rasmus Girlfriend in google. It’s one of the first links.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
there are girlfriend forums
for married players?
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
They will usually say he is married or be empty.
Most have nothing at all like Joe Thurston’s.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
OMFG
this is batshit insane.
and is it me, or did that first poster actually achieve the feat of typing with a hillbilly accent? “Hyuk, I been a knowin Colby long as a rooster’s day, everyone said me an him was a gonna get hitched all cousin like, but that chicken won’t cluck no more”
by mattyp on Feb 10, 2010 7:35 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs
I feel my life has somehow been cheapened after reading all that. Thanks a lot, you SOB.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
I know.
I think maybe he was trying to add credibility to his statement that he has been knowing Colby for so long.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
haha
when you posted this, I was looking for a post just like that, but now I understand that you were summarizing. I like it.
I'm really enjoying this Miike Snow album.
A few tracks:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oKQSAt4c4c
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TqVEVH4Q3sQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKKomGBOx0I
Also, Miike Snow does PBJ:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZZ4KyVQA0E
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
I really liked Black and Blue
and plastic jungle.
by vivaelpujols on Feb 11, 2010 12:20 AM EST up reply actions
Also, I swore this song was the Silversun Pickups or someone,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4ajwiV_7W0
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
For my Valentine's Day Crush Party with my sorority they drew hearts on our hands instead X's.
Now I have two humongous hearts on my hands for all eternity (probably about saturday before they wash all the way off).
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
Sounds like potentially killer tattoos
You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France?
by jd is legend on Feb 11, 2010 1:45 AM EST up reply actions
I know pegacorns are now verboten, and many of you have probably already seen this, but so what
Graham Watanabe on what it’s like to be in the Olympics:
Try to imagine Pegasus mating with a unicorn and the creature that they birth. I somehow tame it and ride it into the sky in the clouds and sunshine and rainbows. That’s what it feels like.Chicago Tribune via Deadspin
So I just got done playing an annual softball tournament
called the Snow Ball. No gloves you pitch a dodgeball, you can throw the ball at the runner.
Snow + Softball + Dodgeball + Alcohol = Epic Win.
* is an Asshat
Also, Dave Concepcion.
Hmm
Alco-ball. Now there’s an idea for a sport.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
You better get all the legal stuff squared away
That right there is a goldmine.
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Feb 13, 2010 10:20 PM EST up reply actions
is it anything like beer pong?
"Some days I feel like the hypotenuse in a love triangle; others as if my lucky number is pi."
I look forward to this every year
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
Snow ball
I usually play in a softball tournament by Indianapolis at the end of February every year, but it’s actual softball + alcohol + cold.
new baby takes precedent this year, though, so I won’t be able to attend.
Blaine Matthew Burns: Albert Pujols' biggest fan (his first words will for sure be "Albert Pujols is RIDICULOUS")
brings to mind this Bernie article from a ways back:
Jocketty has to get an Itzhak Perlman for the Cardinals
I have no idea why I remember that article.
by brackenthebox on Feb 17, 2010 7:11 AM EST up reply actions
Some metaphors sound better in your head.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
Oh it's fucking on.
"What's your favorite Chuck Palahniuk book?"
"I like the one about the alienated character who finds the socially unacceptable way of coping with modernity."
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