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Colby's Sonnet

A Sonnet for Colby, since I don’t make videos

 

A player who glides to catch a ball,

And hits home runs to escape a bind,

Teleports to first to the shock of all,

Such a player must be hard to find.

 

But Colby, Corzy, or Corey Rainbow,

Easily forgotten for not selling it,

Not playing many games in a row,

Can run, catch, dive and of course he can hit.

 

His cowboy accent, carefree attitude

Make interviews a funny adventure

“He could be better… he needs to improve,”

 Says one crotchety, dated announcer.

 

But I love Colby and I always will

For his plays, home runs, and his fine flat bill.

 

 

 

 

So, maybe it's not the best poetic work ever but this is my sonnet for everyone's favorite rookie (or at least mine). Hope you enjoy it. It may not be as epic as the awesome Fire Burning video but like I said I don't do videos. I threw in some nice VEB jokes just for you.

24 recs  |  Comment 115 comments

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Wondrous!

QWxiZXJ0IFB1am9scyBpcyByaWRpY3Vsb3Vz

by vexedtechie on Sep 23, 2009 1:17 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Huzzah!

There was Gibson in the Reds' dugout, visibly manhandling about three Reds and tossing them bodily out of the dugout and onto the field...He was the toughest athlete mentally I ever saw, and the greatest competitor. JACK BUCK

by ISawGodInGibby'sRightArm on Sep 23, 2009 1:17 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Lovely

Although I admit, I read the first five lines to the tune of Cake’s “She’s Going the Distance.”

That’s my literary failure, not yours.

Guys like Bradley are exactly why we can't have a pumpkin patch anymore.

by liam on Sep 23, 2009 1:18 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

love it!

Perhaps CR inspires “bowel shaking earthquakes” in the opposition a la the song lyrics. (here: http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/The-Distance-lyrics-Cake/834CDA49D93A99F2482568A8000D7867)

Imerman Angels 1on1 Cancer Support - ask me more if someone you know is fighting cancer.

by airhad on Sep 23, 2009 8:30 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

link fail

http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/The-Distance-lyrics-Cake/834CDA49D93A99F2482568A8000D7867

Imerman Angels 1on1 Cancer Support - ask me more if someone you know is fighting cancer.

by airhad on Sep 23, 2009 8:30 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nicely done.

Does this become the de factor postgame overflow thread?

by Andyfantastic on Sep 23, 2009 1:18 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

How do you get rid of that start fragment end fragment thing? It doesn’t show up where I type so I can’t delete it.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:19 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

I fixed it. Sorry. It bothered me.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:22 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Of course, hope means being cut down on some street corner, as you run like mad, by a random bullet.

by prophetjohn on Sep 23, 2009 1:26 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

nicely done

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 1:47 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Nice...but I thought sonnets had to be in iambic pentameter?

A
B
A
B
C
D
C
D
E
E
…right?

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:07 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

I mean iambic pentameter

plus the rhyme scheme outlined above.

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:08 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

anyway, I'm just being picky.

good work.

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:09 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

sonnets are fascist

"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT

by Yadi2Second on Sep 23, 2009 9:17 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hey now.....

Billy Shakes was NOT a fascist.

by mtalken on Sep 24, 2009 3:04 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

It is in iambic pentameter. I my hav bent the rules sometimes but mostly it’s iambic pentameter. And it abab cdcd efef gg.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I was just being a pedantic jerk.

I liked it.

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Allan Craig didn't get called up

lame

Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage

by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 23, 2009 2:35 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

whatfuck//1?!

"Of course Kolby Rasmus was going deep! That’s what Kolby Rasmus does! You don’t give Kolby Rasmus second chances!" -Kolby Rasmus

by hazel on Sep 23, 2009 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

@$%& the heck?

Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.

by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

rec

Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage

by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 23, 2009 2:39 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

This is awesome.

Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.

by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 9:17 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Outstanding!

and I never stayed within the sing-songy rules of Iambic pentameter either. Nice to see there are folks who still know what poetry is…

:=8)

Big McLargehuge!
:=8O

by The MooCow on Sep 23, 2009 9:37 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

A fine job Miss Clemson.

A rec for you.

"There is not a better feeling in the whole world than knowing that you are the best team in both leagues."- Bob Forsh on winning the 1982 World Series.

by MaytheForschbewithyou on Sep 23, 2009 11:22 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

clemsongirl and rasmusgirl need to have a colby battle

now

"Albert hits good pitches hard and bad pitches even harder. And when he gets in the batter's box, if you pray, then you start praying. And if you don't pray, you think about starting."--Brian Bannister

by VolsnCards5 on Sep 23, 2009 11:32 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

You just want a girl fight.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Dudes and Dudettes

We can’t have this kind of division going into the playoffs. That’s bad karma.

Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.

by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 12:52 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I have no problem with her. But from now on can we be everyone’s favortie fangirls, plural?

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

It seems Colby has plenty of fangirls.

Sadly I’m another one of them. Nicely done by the way. I liked it.

by tlg80 on Sep 23, 2009 1:53 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Shit

He’s practically reduced all of us to fangirls.

Not afraid to nitpick

by joker24 on Sep 23, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

and fanbots

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 5:21 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nothing to do with Colby

but love the sig, Bo is hilarious

No excuses. No injuries. No "better luck next time"
Do it, and shut the f—- up.
-Reggie Jackson

by stlwcards on Sep 24, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

first person to catch it...well done

I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.

by slu on Sep 24, 2009 7:31 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

GOB

I’m pretty sure they would actually reward a player/team for this type of support from 2 young ladies.

by The former Toris34 on Sep 23, 2009 2:59 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

awesome CG

btw, you realize that colby couldn’t even pronounce the word sonnet, let alone appreciate the effort, right?
Also, someone needs to print this out, take it to a game, and have him autograph it.

by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:08 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

nice avatar

i just happened to be listening to BF as your comment came up.

by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:14 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

if*

I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.

by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:18 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

no, you?

I don’t live in the area, plus i have a baby at home. I don’t get out much right now.

by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:19 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

hellz to the yeah i am

super amped for it

I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.

by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:20 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I am

and very excited for it.

by dcfcblues on Sep 25, 2009 3:54 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Now which ever one of you created the phony RasmusGirl profile..

plz login and type something clever and divisive. I want to be entertained by a cyber cat fight!

by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:17 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

so am i the only man on the planet who doesn't like to watch women fight?

i

just

don’t

get

it

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

shall I introduce you to...

Miss Gina Carano

"All baseball fans can be divided into two groups: those who come to batting practice and the others. Only those in the first category have much chance of amounting to anything."--Thomas Boswell

by albrtfn on Sep 23, 2009 6:48 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

ROWR!

;=8)

Big McLargehuge!
:=8O

by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

My husband doesn't like it either.

"I’m going to come after you." - Chris Carpenter

by spants on Sep 23, 2009 8:06 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else — and it hasn’t — it’s that girls should stick to girl’s sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
- Homer Simpson

"In 2035, 25 young men will be able to call themselves world champions. Some of those guys haven’t even been born yet. And some of them are Asian." -Mike Shannon

by Alxfritz on Sep 23, 2009 8:24 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

you're just saying that so you can have baked goods

"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT

by Yadi2Second on Sep 24, 2009 12:09 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I read that as "....Baked goods...." with a heavy euphemistic tone

in the style of Monty Python’s “Nudge Nudge”.

That’s almost certainly just me.

Felonius Monk - bitching to contact since 2008

by Felonius_Monk on Sep 24, 2009 6:02 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

it is gdm, after all

"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT

by Yadi2Second on Sep 24, 2009 8:31 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

you never know with that assclown

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well done and rec'd

But who cares about the format? It’s good regardless!

The only thing that would make this game better is a walkoff! - said in walkoff situations since 9/19/09

WALKOFFZ R MOAR FUNN! - used after walkoffs since 9/19/09

Cards: Don't sign Rick "Rallykill" Ankiel next year please!

by zoomzoomj88 on Sep 23, 2009 5:39 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Gosh, I said I was sorry

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 8:18 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I wasn’t really upset. I wrote it at 1 in the morning.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 10:24 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm glad you aren't

but others seem to be

"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion

by andi_k on Sep 24, 2009 1:45 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

You Should Write....

…a nice one about cows…
;=8)

Big McLargehuge!
:=8O

by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

i love steak!

fin

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

i anxiously await azru's one-up effort

A velvet portrait of cody – wait for it – drawn in his own motor oil.

Well done, clemsongirl!

PS – re: the rhyme scheme- you could also write an italian sonnet, which has a different rhyme scheme – this is a shakespearean or english sonnet.

/english nerd

the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus

by tom s. on Sep 24, 2009 3:03 AM EDT via mobile reply actions   0 recs

I know but I don’t remember the rhymoe scheme of and Italian/Petrarchan sonnet. I know it’s spilt into 6 and 8 lines. That wasn’t really the right format for this though since this is a poem of devotion. Italian sonnets often set up a problem and solution, if I rememer right.
/another English nerd

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 10:37 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

He’s pretty good. He was on the AP Test when I took it and there was a big uproar that he was too mainstream and that some students had an unfair advantage because they could have studied him and others may not have.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

La Belle Dame Sans Merci...

…remains my favorite poem of all time. And Goblin Market (Roseetti) too!

AND of course Ogden Nash:

“The cow is of the bovine ilk
One end is moo, the other, milk”

;=8)

Big McLargehuge!
:=8O

by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 12:24 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Very nice.

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 5:07 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

CG

Your thunder has just been stolen

"You just keep pounding balls into the gap. The one thing you don’t want to do is hit a home run. That’s a rally-killer." - Jeff Francouer

by jd is legend on Sep 24, 2009 7:29 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

the pulitizer committee needs to see this.

the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus

by tom s. on Sep 24, 2009 6:15 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oh My

Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka

* sarcasm might be involved in this comment

by mattyfrommo on Sep 24, 2009 7:20 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

or to quote one of our own

 THAT’S a WINNER!

Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka

* sarcasm might be involved in this comment

by mattyfrommo on Sep 24, 2009 7:35 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

wow

that should be green damnit

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:35 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

done.

"In 2035, 25 young men will be able to call themselves world champions. Some of those guys haven’t even been born yet. And some of them are Asian." -Mike Shannon

by Alxfritz on Sep 24, 2009 7:35 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

props

or whatever poets say to commend each other…

"All baseball fans can be divided into two groups: those who come to batting practice and the others. Only those in the first category have much chance of amounting to anything."--Thomas Boswell

by albrtfn on Sep 25, 2009 1:47 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

hi jack!

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 25, 2009 5:43 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

No jacking was intended

lo(w) or hi(gh)

Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.

by mattybobo on Sep 25, 2009 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Rec'd, would read again.

Felonius Monk - bitching to contact since 2008

by Felonius_Monk on Sep 28, 2009 6:00 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

this thread

just turned into the literary version of this:

by _pistol_ on Sep 25, 2009 4:55 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Whoever rec'd this thread needs to turn their Card in?

ReallllllY?

"I think he's the best hitter of all time. I think there has never been a better hitter than him. And I know I didn't see them all, but I just don't think there could be." - Adam Wainwright on The Mang

by bmorgan on Sep 26, 2009 1:22 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

and i didn't mean this towards mattybobo

"I think he's the best hitter of all time. I think there has never been a better hitter than him. And I know I didn't see them all, but I just don't think there could be." - Adam Wainwright on The Mang

by bmorgan on Sep 26, 2009 1:24 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

What?

Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?

by ClemsonGirl on Sep 26, 2009 11:25 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

igonore it

this was freakin’ awesome

Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka

* sarcasm might be involved in this comment

by mattyfrommo on Sep 26, 2009 11:32 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

i think he's saying men shouldn't like poetry or something

Which is just plain dumb, especially with something as sweet as this.

I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.

by slu on Sep 26, 2009 12:39 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

it's 2009

even the mancrush is fresh

"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT

by Yadi2Second on Sep 26, 2009 1:16 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

what card are you talking about?

that whole man card stuff is bullshit. i hate that garbage. only douchebags use that term.

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 26, 2009 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

real men don't use cards

Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage

by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 26, 2009 6:46 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

mix tapes and bubble gum

"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT

by Yadi2Second on Sep 27, 2009 1:46 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

pastry fail.

Cake? Pie!

the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus

by tom s. on Sep 28, 2009 1:15 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Cakes are good, too!

"I’m going to come after you." - Chris Carpenter

by spants on Sep 28, 2009 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

not as good as piez

pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels

by gdm426 on Sep 28, 2009 8:15 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wut about gooey butter cakez

Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.

by mattybobo on Sep 28, 2009 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

mmmmm

"...football games always make me thankful for two things:
1. Teams that pass the ball downfield.
2. Baseball games. "
--DanUpBaby

by albrtfn on Sep 30, 2009 9:49 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

pie is liquid cake

-jim gaffigan

I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.

"OHHHHH!!!!!!! IT TASTES. SO. GOOD!!!!!!!!!!"
-BOOOOOOOOG

by slu on Sep 30, 2009 12:22 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

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