Colby's Sonnet
A Sonnet for Colby, since I don’t make videos
A player who glides to catch a ball,
And hits home runs to escape a bind,
Teleports to first to the shock of all,
Such a player must be hard to find.
But Colby, Corzy, or Corey Rainbow,
Easily forgotten for not selling it,
Not playing many games in a row,
Can run, catch, dive and of course he can hit.
His cowboy accent, carefree attitude
Make interviews a funny adventure
“He could be better… he needs to improve,”
Says one crotchety, dated announcer.
But I love Colby and I always will
For his plays, home runs, and his fine flat bill.
So, maybe it's not the best poetic work ever but this is my sonnet for everyone's favorite rookie (or at least mine). Hope you enjoy it. It may not be as epic as the awesome Fire Burning video but like I said I don't do videos. I threw in some nice VEB jokes just for you.
24 recs |
115 comments
Comments
Wondrous!
QWxiZXJ0IFB1am9scyBpcyByaWRpY3Vsb3Vz
by vexedtechie on Sep 23, 2009 1:17 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Huzzah!
There was Gibson in the Reds' dugout, visibly manhandling about three Reds and tossing them bodily out of the dugout and onto the field...He was the toughest athlete mentally I ever saw, and the greatest competitor. JACK BUCK
by ISawGodInGibby'sRightArm on Sep 23, 2009 1:17 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Lovely
Although I admit, I read the first five lines to the tune of Cake’s “She’s Going the Distance.”
That’s my literary failure, not yours.
Guys like Bradley are exactly why we can't have a pumpkin patch anymore.
by liam on Sep 23, 2009 1:18 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
love it!
Perhaps CR inspires “bowel shaking earthquakes” in the opposition a la the song lyrics. (here: http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/The-Distance-lyrics-Cake/834CDA49D93A99F2482568A8000D7867)
Imerman Angels 1on1 Cancer Support - ask me more if someone you know is fighting cancer.
by airhad on Sep 23, 2009 8:30 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
link fail
http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/The-Distance-lyrics-Cake/834CDA49D93A99F2482568A8000D7867
Imerman Angels 1on1 Cancer Support - ask me more if someone you know is fighting cancer.
by airhad on Sep 23, 2009 8:30 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Nicely done.
Does this become the de factor postgame overflow thread?
by Andyfantastic on Sep 23, 2009 1:18 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Reply fail
I should just go to bed
by Andyfantastic on Sep 23, 2009 1:19 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
How do you get rid of that start fragment end fragment thing? It doesn’t show up where I type so I can’t delete it.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:19 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I think all sonnets should end with <!---End Fragment--->
by Andyfantastic on Sep 23, 2009 1:21 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I fixed it. Sorry. It bothered me.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:22 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
![]()
Of course, hope means being cut down on some street corner, as you run like mad, by a random bullet.
by prophetjohn on Sep 23, 2009 1:26 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
nicely done
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 1:47 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Nice...but I thought sonnets had to be in iambic pentameter?
A
B
A
B
C
D
C
D
E
E
…right?
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:07 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I mean iambic pentameter
plus the rhyme scheme outlined above.
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:08 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
anyway, I'm just being picky.
good work.
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 2:09 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The whole point of rules in Art . . .
is to break them.
by alberich on Sep 23, 2009 8:44 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
sonnets are fascist
"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT
by Yadi2Second on Sep 23, 2009 9:17 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey now.....
Billy Shakes was NOT a fascist.
by mtalken on Sep 24, 2009 3:04 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
It is in iambic pentameter. I my hav bent the rules sometimes but mostly it’s iambic pentameter. And it abab cdcd efef gg.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I was just being a pedantic jerk.
I liked it.
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Allan Craig didn't get called up
lame
Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 23, 2009 2:35 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
whatfuck//1?!
"Of course Kolby Rasmus was going deep! That’s what Kolby Rasmus does! You don’t give Kolby Rasmus second chances!" -Kolby Rasmus
by hazel on Sep 23, 2009 10:34 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
@$%& the heck?
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 10:40 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
This has nothing to do with Colby.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 10:41 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
rec
Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 23, 2009 2:39 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
This is awesome.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 9:17 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Outstanding!
and I never stayed within the sing-songy rules of Iambic pentameter either. Nice to see there are folks who still know what poetry is…
:=8)
Big McLargehuge!
:=8O
by The MooCow on Sep 23, 2009 9:37 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
A fine job Miss Clemson.
A rec for you.
"There is not a better feeling in the whole world than knowing that you are the best team in both leagues."- Bob Forsh on winning the 1982 World Series.
by MaytheForschbewithyou on Sep 23, 2009 11:22 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
clemsongirl and rasmusgirl need to have a colby battle
now
"Albert hits good pitches hard and bad pitches even harder. And when he gets in the batter's box, if you pray, then you start praying. And if you don't pray, you think about starting."--Brian Bannister
by VolsnCards5 on Sep 23, 2009 11:32 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
You just want a girl fight.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Cat fight is the technical term
Not afraid to nitpick
by joker24 on Sep 23, 2009 12:11 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
CHIC-FIGHT!!!!
:=8D
Big McLargehuge!
:=8O
by The MooCow on Sep 23, 2009 12:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dudes and Dudettes
We can’t have this kind of division going into the playoffs. That’s bad karma.
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 23, 2009 12:52 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I have no problem with her. But from now on can we be everyone’s favortie fangirls, plural?
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
It seems Colby has plenty of fangirls.
Sadly I’m another one of them. Nicely done by the way. I liked it.
by tlg80 on Sep 23, 2009 1:53 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Shit
He’s practically reduced all of us to fangirls.
Not afraid to nitpick
by joker24 on Sep 23, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
and fanbots
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 5:21 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
i will use the plural from now on....well done
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Nothing to do with Colby
but love the sig, Bo is hilarious
No excuses. No injuries. No "better luck next time"
Do it, and shut the f—- up.
-Reggie Jackson
by stlwcards on Sep 24, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
first person to catch it...well done
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 24, 2009 7:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
GOB
I’m pretty sure they would actually reward a player/team for this type of support from 2 young ladies.
by The former Toris34 on Sep 23, 2009 2:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
awesome CG
btw, you realize that colby couldn’t even pronounce the word sonnet, let alone appreciate the effort, right?
Also, someone needs to print this out, take it to a game, and have him autograph it.
by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:08 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
or, as i said last night, get the cat to recite it to him
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
nice avatar
i just happened to be listening to BF as your comment came up.
by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:14 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
thx...seeing him next week? (of youre from the lou)
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:16 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
no, you?
I don’t live in the area, plus i have a baby at home. I don’t get out much right now.
by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
hellz to the yeah i am
super amped for it
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 23, 2009 3:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Now which ever one of you created the phony RasmusGirl profile..
plz login and type something clever and divisive. I want to be entertained by a cyber cat fight!
by _pistol_ on Sep 23, 2009 3:17 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
so am i the only man on the planet who doesn't like to watch women fight?
i
just
don’t
get
it
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
shall I introduce you to...
"All baseball fans can be divided into two groups: those who come to batting practice and the others. Only those in the first category have much chance of amounting to anything."--Thomas Boswell
by albrtfn on Sep 23, 2009 6:48 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
My husband doesn't like it either.
"I’m going to come after you." - Chris Carpenter
by spants on Sep 23, 2009 8:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else — and it hasn’t — it’s that girls should stick to girl’s sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
- Homer Simpson
"In 2035, 25 young men will be able to call themselves world champions. Some of those guys haven’t even been born yet. And some of them are Asian." -Mike Shannon
by Alxfritz on Sep 23, 2009 8:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
the moar i hear about him, the moar i think he & i could be friends
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 23, 2009 10:43 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
you're just saying that so you can have baked goods
"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT
by Yadi2Second on Sep 24, 2009 12:09 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I read that as "....Baked goods...." with a heavy euphemistic tone
in the style of Monty Python’s “Nudge Nudge”.
That’s almost certainly just me.
Felonius Monk - bitching to contact since 2008
by Felonius_Monk on Sep 24, 2009 6:02 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
it is gdm, after all
"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT
by Yadi2Second on Sep 24, 2009 8:31 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
you never know with that assclown
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Well done and rec'd
But who cares about the format? It’s good regardless!
The only thing that would make this game better is a walkoff! - said in walkoff situations since 9/19/09
WALKOFFZ R MOAR FUNN! - used after walkoffs since 9/19/09
Cards: Don't sign Rick "Rallykill" Ankiel next year please!
by zoomzoomj88 on Sep 23, 2009 5:39 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Gosh, I said I was sorry
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 23, 2009 8:18 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I wasn’t really upset. I wrote it at 1 in the morning.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 23, 2009 10:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I'm glad you aren't
but others seem to be
"I think those scorers must be from Mars or Venus. Or maybe they're just from that book." --Mike Shannon, 7/09/2009
"POOL TEMPERATURES FUCK YEAH"--tgreenfield, The September 10th-11th VEB Off-Topic Explosion
by andi_k on Sep 24, 2009 1:45 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
You Should Write....
…a nice one about cows…
;=8)
Big McLargehuge!
:=8O
by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
i love steak!
fin
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
well, how can I not rec this?
Excellent.
by DanUpBaby on Sep 23, 2009 7:48 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
i anxiously await azru's one-up effort
A velvet portrait of cody – wait for it – drawn in his own motor oil.
Well done, clemsongirl!
PS – re: the rhyme scheme- you could also write an italian sonnet, which has a different rhyme scheme – this is a shakespearean or english sonnet.
/english nerd
the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus
by tom s. on Sep 24, 2009 3:03 AM EDT via mobile reply actions 0 recs
I know but I don’t remember the rhymoe scheme of and Italian/Petrarchan sonnet. I know it’s spilt into 6 and 8 lines. That wasn’t really the right format for this though since this is a poem of devotion. Italian sonnets often set up a problem and solution, if I rememer right.
/another English nerd
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 10:37 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Any John Keats Fans Here?
:=8)
Big McLargehuge!
:=8O
by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 10:53 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
He’s pretty good. He was on the AP Test when I took it and there was a big uproar that he was too mainstream and that some students had an unfair advantage because they could have studied him and others may not have.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 10:57 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
La Belle Dame Sans Merci...
…remains my favorite poem of all time. And Goblin Market (Roseetti) too!
AND of course Ogden Nash:
“The cow is of the bovine ilk
One end is moo, the other, milk”
;=8)
Big McLargehuge!
:=8O
by The MooCow on Sep 24, 2009 12:24 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Colby, Colby, burning bright
In the outfield, in the night,
What sportswriter, near or far
Could guess thy fearful UZR?
And what feeble outfield mitt
Could catch the quickness of thy hit?
In what manner could he try
To stop your smooth walk-off Big Fly?
And what coach won’t see you shine,
Forcing you to ride the pine?
What old fogey could repeat
Such managerial conceit?
Why the sore heel? Why lost weight?
Why all the White Castles thou ate?
Why the strikeouts? Why no glee?
Why thy sub-par OBP?
When next season comes your way
When Cards prepare again to play
Will you build on your success?
Will all the signals point to Yes?
Colby, Colby, burning bright
In the outfied, in the night,
What sportswriter, near or far
Could guess they fearful UZR?
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 24, 2009 4:58 PM EDT reply actions 16 recs
Very nice.
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 24, 2009 5:07 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
CG
Your thunder has just been stolen
"You just keep pounding balls into the gap. The one thing you don’t want to do is hit a home run. That’s a rally-killer." - Jeff Francouer
by jd is legend on Sep 24, 2009 7:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
the pulitizer committee needs to see this.
the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus
by tom s. on Sep 24, 2009 6:15 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oh My
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Sep 24, 2009 7:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
or to quote one of our own
THAT’S a WINNER!
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Sep 24, 2009 7:35 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
wow
that should be green damnit
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 24, 2009 7:35 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
And I thought that I liked Blake's Tyger...
by Kind_Al on Sep 25, 2009 12:32 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
props
or whatever poets say to commend each other…
"All baseball fans can be divided into two groups: those who come to batting practice and the others. Only those in the first category have much chance of amounting to anything."--Thomas Boswell
by albrtfn on Sep 25, 2009 1:47 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
well-done matty
way to high-jack the thread
by _pistol_ on Sep 25, 2009 4:49 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
hi jack!
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 25, 2009 5:43 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
No jacking was intended
lo(w) or hi(gh)
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 25, 2009 7:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Rec'd, would read again.
Felonius Monk - bitching to contact since 2008
by Felonius_Monk on Sep 28, 2009 6:00 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
this thread
just turned into the literary version of this:
![]()
by _pistol_ on Sep 25, 2009 4:55 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Whoever rec'd this thread needs to turn their Card in?
ReallllllY?
"I think he's the best hitter of all time. I think there has never been a better hitter than him. And I know I didn't see them all, but I just don't think there could be." - Adam Wainwright on The Mang
by bmorgan on Sep 26, 2009 1:22 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
and i didn't mean this towards mattybobo
"I think he's the best hitter of all time. I think there has never been a better hitter than him. And I know I didn't see them all, but I just don't think there could be." - Adam Wainwright on The Mang
by bmorgan on Sep 26, 2009 1:24 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
What?
Who needs affection when you can have blind hatred?
by ClemsonGirl on Sep 26, 2009 11:25 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
igonore it
this was freakin’ awesome
Lighten up, Francis - Sergeant Hulka
* sarcasm might be involved in this comment
by mattyfrommo on Sep 26, 2009 11:32 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
i think he's saying men shouldn't like poetry or something
Which is just plain dumb, especially with something as sweet as this.
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 26, 2009 12:39 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
it's 2009
even the mancrush is fresh
"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT
by Yadi2Second on Sep 26, 2009 1:16 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
what card are you talking about?
that whole man card stuff is bullshit. i hate that garbage. only douchebags use that term.
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 26, 2009 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
real men don't use cards
Positronic Upgraded Juggernaut Optimized for Logical Sabotage
by Cards Fan in Chitown on Sep 26, 2009 6:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
real men have daily hot tub sessions, write poetry, and give dating advice
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
by slu on Sep 26, 2009 6:48 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
mix tapes and bubble gum
"It was like two ankles." AVENGE BOOG
"But listen, and understand: more Molinas are out there. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear." - THT
by Yadi2Second on Sep 27, 2009 1:46 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
And bake coconut cream cakes for Matt Holliday, goddammit!
Felonius Monk - bitching to contact since 2008
by Felonius_Monk on Sep 28, 2009 6:00 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
pastry fail.
Cake? Pie!
the truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark/ it scares you witless, but in time you see things clear and stark -- macmanus
by tom s. on Sep 28, 2009 1:15 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Cakes are good, too!
"I’m going to come after you." - Chris Carpenter
by spants on Sep 28, 2009 7:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
not as good as piez
pretzels pretzels pretzels pretzels
by gdm426 on Sep 28, 2009 8:15 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Wut about gooey butter cakez
Albert Pujols does not have "down" years. He has "~6 WAR" years.
by mattybobo on Sep 28, 2009 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
pie is liquid cake
-jim gaffigan
I'm like a polygon, I'm edgy.
"OHHHHH!!!!!!! IT TASTES. SO. GOOD!!!!!!!!!!"
-BOOOOOOOOG
by slu on Sep 30, 2009 12:22 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

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