Closing It Out With a Laugh

Well, the 2008 Cardinal season ended today in Skip Schumaker's glove. A season of exciting early-inning rallies, surprising HR totals, and frustrating bullpen appearances. But all in all, it was a good season in the end. And as I find time in my Sunday night to recall this season's best, worst and most bizarre moments, I'll do my best to try to close out the season with a laugh. Here I present the 2008 Cardinal team "And You Thought You Knew" moments:

1. Right after Jason Isringhausen bought the motorized cooler for the bullpen, TLR thought it would be a great idea for home so he bought one. He said, and I quote: "I like the idea of the cooler on wheels. I just don't feel like filling it with energy drinks." I think you now know why he got a 3rd DUI

2. If Cesar Izturis batted in the 3rd spot in the lineup, Chris Young would still be pitching today...

3. After the bullpen's 25th blown save, Mo said on the post-game conference: "We are now in negotiations with opposing teams to bring a quality arm to aid our bullpen." Unluckily, the Jets beat us and signed Favre...

4. Al Hrabosky is facing a lawsuit for throwing a peanut bag to an angry Cubs fan.

5. Juan Encarnacion is currently under negotiations to play with the Pirates... (Lord, I apologize for that)

6. Scott Spiezio also bought a motorized cooler.

7. If Yadier Molina batted in the 3rd spot in the lineup, Josh Bard would be dead... 

8.  Anthony Reyes reminded us that you don't have to be good to be called a prospect... Colby Rasmus, we all hope you are not the case...

9. Rick Ankiel's second outfield assist in Colorado killed a bird in its trajectory.

10. After Ted Lilly ran over Yadier Molina at home plate, our beloved catcher said in his native language: "Ese flaco me saco la mierda. Voy a buscar a su familia y tendre revancha", which translated verbally spells: "Ouch! That hurt!"

11. Chris Duncan and Skip Schumaker worked hard to not let Cardinal fans forget another can't-hit-lefties outfielder. We sure miss you Jimmy.

12. Our astounding record against the Brewers reminded us that it is NOT pleasant to see Prince Fielder untucking his shirt...

13. Our bullpen losses, blown saves and Zambrano's no-hitter proved to be very profficient for St. Louis' Anger Management Facilities.

14. Mozeliak went 1-for-4 in his "rehabbing pitchers" plate appearances. His lone hit was Josh Kinney...

15. This October will be much like last year for Cardinal fans as we will grab a beer, turn our TV sets on, switch over to FSN or ESPN and hope or pray that someone, anyone beat the crap out of the Cubs in post season play!

I do hope you enjoyed my comedy (If you can call that that). Great run Cards. To our offense Kudos. To our starters Kudos. To our bullpen... Yadi has a message to you: " Voy a buscar a su familia y tendre revancha".

Thanks, cheers, go cards!