What to root for?

What does a baseball fan care about when there is zero chance his/her team will achieve any success? My quick and dirty list:

Five ribbies and seven runs for Pujols so he can keep the streaks going

A continued collapse by the New York Mets

A division crown for the Milwaukee Brewers

Batting crowns for Placido Polanco and Edgar Renteria, two all-time favorites

No pitching triple crown for Jake the Snake Peavy - one of the least likable characters in baseball

Wainwright finishing the season without any elbow owwies (why not just shelve him now?)

How about it? Am I forgetting anything obvious?

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