breaking news from The Onion

by lboros on Jun 1, 2006 4:45 PM EDT in St. Louis Cardinals News

america's finest news source, The Onion, reports on anthony reyes' eager attempts to ingratiate himself with The Big Pu:

"His first day with the club, he told Albert that he was his idol, and that he always wanted to be a first-baseman, and then offered to clean out Albert's locker," said centerfielder Jim Edmonds, whom other Cardinals suspect may just be angry that none of the rookies ever care about endearing themselves to him. "He's always loudly applauding routine ground balls that Albert fields at first base, and after every one of Albert's at-bats, there's Ant with a cup of his favorite Gatorade flavor, a handful of sunflower seeds, and a moist towel."

the poor kid would prob'y have to be included in any trade for jason schmidt, an unlikely transaction about which some of us were wet-dreaming this morning. the same notion (ie, a schmidt trade) had SB Nation brother blogger McCovey Chronicles crapping his pants. he says he would rather lose an ear in a knife fight at a finnish brothel than see schmidt dealt. but he's clearly worried about the possibility . . . . of the trade, i mean. McCovey Chronicler doesn't even carry a knife . . . .

hey, look who's ended up back in the nl central. yan but not forgotten . . . .

in case you hadn't noticed, encarnacion had a pretty good month in may -- .809 ops. see danup for the details.

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I could've gone

the rest of my life without seeing Yan's name again...

by cardsrul on Jun 1, 2006 5:10 PM EDT reply actions

The funny thing...

is that the Angels are paying the Reds to take him off their hands. They took a warm body from the minors in exchange for dumping Yan Can't Pitch.

When you get dealt along with the money to pay you for a non-prospect, you know you suck.

Obsessions of a Cardinal Fan

by Quietude on Jun 1, 2006 10:11 PM EDT up reply actions

As long as we're on breaking news

El Hombre to open St. Louis area restuarant:

http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/sports/stories.nsf/cardinals/story/70E7793B6E3886288625718000597CC7 ?OpenDocument

I'll be looking forward to reading reviews here from the locals.

by sdesserman on Jun 1, 2006 5:13 PM EDT reply actions

Per a previous joke on VEB

"The Porterhouse steak was fresh and excellent. I've never had mushroom sauce this good."

by sdrone on Jun 1, 2006 5:35 PM EDT up reply actions

I think that we've discussed Juanny's May

...it's just that he is in a run-driving-in role and his RISP average has fallen to .189 and his average with Runners on Base (BAWROB?) is still only .222. So why not pitcher around The Greatest Baseball Player in the World and Scottie Rolen?

His .809 OPS for May, if it had been for the whole season up to this point would make him 16th in MLB behind the Royals' RF OPS.

His .299 OBP for the month is still horrendous. Again, if it had been at this higher level all season it would rank 26th in all of MLB, again behind the Royals RF OBP.

His .274 BA for the month would rank him 19th in all of MLB, interestingly between the Padres (who have a formerly coveted RF)and Phillies (who have a currently coveted RF). Of course, in fairness, each of their OBP is .400 or better.

by bgh on Jun 1, 2006 6:01 PM EDT reply actions

REVISION

Utilizing ESPN.com's statistics page, their "More Splits" page does not have yesterday's numbers factored in yet; however, their initial splits page does and Juan, after going 0-for-5 yesterday has a .260 May batting average, not .274. If he had achieved this level of hitting proficiency for the season, it would be good for 22nd in MLB, just ahead of the Royals.

by bgh on Jun 1, 2006 6:11 PM EDT up reply actions

Just a thought

If the cards make a deal it might the only one they make considering the chips they have to deal with. Not much in the cupboard in my mind

by Poooo Daddy on Jun 1, 2006 6:08 PM EDT reply actions

New column up at Yahoo Sports

Has two Cards on the "all-overpaid" team (Edmonds, Izzy) and one on the "all-underpaid" team (Pujols, who "would be underpaid if he made $25 million").

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AvH7cwyGNrgrOKc8Vk74l1ERvLYF?slug=jp-overunder060106&prov= yhoo&type=lgns

by BTown Birds fan on Jun 1, 2006 6:22 PM EDT reply actions

I love how everyone labels Izzy overpaid

ANd yet, he sure seems to pile up the saves.

by sdrone on Jun 1, 2006 9:27 PM EDT up reply actions

izzy

if izzy is on the overpaid list then i guess just about every other closer not named Papelbon should be too.

That's a Winner!

by WarningTrackPower on Jun 2, 2006 12:58 AM EDT reply actions

I wouldn't trade Reyes for Schmidt straight up,

I don't like the way Schmidt's K rate is headed.

by DanUpBaby on Jun 2, 2006 7:49 AM EDT reply actions

Reyes for Schmidt

Would be a HORRIBLE deal, and I think Walt knows it. According to PECOTA, Reyes' Wins Above Replacement Player this year would be 3.5, if he started 24 games. PECOTA has Schmidt projected at 5.6 WARP for this year, but he's off to a good start so let's give him his 75% level of 6.7. Schmidt is making $10.5 million and this is his walk year.
So half a season of Schmidt costs you about $5 million and gains you about 1.5 wins over just sticking Reyes in the rotation. For this you give up six cost-controlled years of Reyes, where he is projected to have a WARP of 16.2 in the first five years. Even with Schmidt slightly increasing our chances of taking it all if we do make it to the postseason, I'll pass.

by mikedallas23 @ Viva El Birdos on Jun 2, 2006 9:48 AM EDT up reply actions

TLR comments, via Bernie

A few items from LaRussa, as posted by Miklasz on his forum this a.m. The line about Reyes being a candidate for the postseason is intriguing, though I suppose the import of it would depend on how exactly TLR phrased his answer. Also curious that as of this a.m. they're still not sure about putting Edmonds on the DL. I would have thought it was a no-brainer, from the way they've been talking about it.

Real quick summary of my interview with TLR on 1380 (just now):

brass will meet with docs and decide what's best to do with Edmonds. If docs think he'll be better in a few days, they'll ride it out. but from what Paletta told me, this will likely take more than a few days -- more like a couple of weeks or longer. so if that's the case, DL. La Russa didnt want to commit this morning but did say even though Edmonds can pinch hit, he'd be wary of Edmonds having a setback and the No. 1 thing is to get him well.
Said they'd have an OF "in the area" to put on roster if Edmonds goes on DL today... wouldn't say who... I noted Gall's absence from MEM lineup last nite and Tony said don't read too much into that.
Tony definitely sounds reluctant to trade starting pitcher from current rotation to get some OF help... says they need to be careful, because pitching is strength and can help overcome other things... says Jocketty will be looking, as always. but it has to make sense...
I asked him a question submitted by Mike (Denver87) about Reyes and whether he'd hesitate to use Reyes in postseason. TLR said he would be willing to use Reyes.... but emphasized Reyes is getting better all the time by pitching at Memphis.
Carpenter on track ... for Tuesday return vs. Reds ... will throw off mound today and if he passes the test, he's good to go...
says Pujols is handling success very well... did say he was concerned a little that the team relies on one player for so much offense.
Says if Edmonds out a while.... when Taguchi plays, for example, they'll use different style... more hit and runs, bunting, etc.

That's all I have time for... back to show...

--B

DCGreg

by DCGreg on Jun 2, 2006 10:09 AM EDT reply actions